Tuesday, October 6, 2009
I really havent blogged for a really long time.. with many reasons.
But i'm back here once again..
It maybe my last time blogging it may not but i hope this would be the last time that i'm feeling like this.. tearing while blogging.. it has been awhile since this happened.
I ask myself.. am I really truly happy now? But i really don't know the answer.. I don't dare to answer. I know i tell myself I'm happy I'm very happy I must be happy. But there's just so many buts.. I hate this feeling.. I scare I actually don't know what is love anymore.. Nowadays it seems as though I don't know if I really know whats love.. My heart seems to far to reach and feel. I scare I no longer know love is just that simple I scare I can no longer see that meaning.
But I know I don't want to make those people around me, who cares and loves me to worry. So no matter what I try to put that smile on my face.. that it's okay attitude... I'm so afraid that one day I'll just fall and people will see. I scare people around me will leave me. I scare those close to me will drift apart from me just like how elaine and me...
My heart hurts so much.
Will you all still love me for who I am? After knowing I aren't that strong.. knowing that I'm actually not that happy. Will you all do anything to cheer me up, or leave me cause I'm a waste of time? Will you all teach me what is it like being really truly happy.. I hope I really did make you all happy.. Did bring joy to you all.
bye.
sealed with a kiss
3:33 AM
clarissawee.
o6o490 (:
fairsian. nanyang poly :)
I'm someone who is simply captivated by beautiful and pretty things..
Fascinated with all the sweet and wonderful things around me like chocolates and flowers..
I adore my friends and time spent with all my dearest..
I enjoy RETAIL THERAPY..
Wanting to live life to the fullest by enjoying every moment and experiencing the best..
This blog is a place where i pen down my thoughts and share about my daily lives and as time goes by it allows me to keep it as a memory.(: